Overall, 2018 was a pretty average year. I wouldn’t say anything major happened, bad or good, and I can’t think of any big milestones. By this time of the year I am generally looking forward to closing it out and starting fresh, but this year I am feeling pretty sad about letting 2018 go. It isn’t often that I have a year so uninteresting that I am scared of what the next will bring! But, I think uninteresting is a good thing every once in a while. It allows us to sit back and relax, in order to prepare for what is to come. So, I thought I’d take some time to look back on the things I learned this year and how I feel I grew as a person.
First of all, 2018 was a year of fun! I went to Denver to watch my crappy Denver Broncos lose to the Texans but I had such a great time! I started working out, which is more fun than I thought it would be, and I picked up some new hobbies like killing 4 hours playing Zelda: Breath of the Wild.
2018 was a year of setting goals but not reaching them. I started out the year wanting to write a book. For years I have been dreaming of seeing a completed novel hot off my printer, and this year was no different. I plopped down at my desk and typed my life away, but again, didn’t complete my goal. I did, however, write over 40,000 words of my novel, and printed about half of the pages so that I could have a tangible trophy of my hard work. I set a goal of getting into a graduate program, which I did, and hope to continue in 2019. My biggest goal I set was to lose 50 pounds this year. I signed up for a gym, threw out my junk food, and lost about 35 pounds this year. In reality, 50 pounds was more than doable, I just couldn’t find the self-motivation to push myself as hard as I should have. But in the end, I did it. I wrote 40,000 words, I got into a program, and I lost weight. No, I didn’t reach my end goal, but unlike most years, I pushed through the laziness and took a step towards completion, which is a win for me!
2018 was a year of “finding myself”, even though I hate that phrase. I think we all struggle at times with knowing who we are and what we want out of life. I don’t know that I have ever had a firm grasp on where my life is going, and as of today I still don’t know, but I do know who I am. I feel that this year I finally understood myself. I have learned that I am a caring individual who loves people no matter what. I have learned that I love to write, even if I’m not that great at it, and I have learned that my opinions and thoughts matter just as much as everyone else’s. I also learned that finding myself means finding others as well. I am surrounded by friends and family who disagree with me on many, many things (you know who you are). But, 2018 has taught me that even though we can’t agree on certain political aspects, we can still love each other. The human race has an incredible capacity for love and this year has shown me that nothing will stand in the way of that if we open our hearts and our minds.
Most importantly, 2018 was the year of no. I said “no” to more things than I ever have this year, and I don’t regret it at all. I am a people pleaser through and through. If you need something done, I will do it, even if I have no time at all. But, in 2018 I decided to focus on myself and my needs a little more, which meant declining some fun offers. I said “no” to friends, family, and coworkers when I needed to, and my anxious brain has been thanking me all year. This year has shown me that it is okay to take time for myself, even if it means disappointing someone else.
So, 2018, I am sad to see you go. You didn’t challenge me much, and thank the Lord, you didn’t break my heart. You have truly been mediocre.